Sam Smith’s “Stay With Me”... stuck in love myth status quo?

“Stay With Me” gets its start from a one night stand. In the music video, Sam Smith swiftly gathers his clothes and slips out of his lover’s apartment without a word. Smith is infatuated with his lover and although it was originally a one night stand, he wants more than just that. It is never clear to audience whether or not the lover reciprocated Smith’s feelings. Smith strikes a chord with many gay men. Finding that perfect guy on Grindr, having an amazing sexual encounter, and suddenly finding oneself emotionally attached. By the end of the music video, there is an entire choir singing and professing Smith’s love and devotion to this mysterious and allusive lover.

Smith is not the first mainstream gay star. We’ve enjoyed Boy George from Culture Club, George Michaels, Elton John, Freddie Mercury , just to name a few. So why is Smith’s entry into the US market important? It is important because, his entry coincides with the LGBT fight for marriage equality movement that continues to spread from state to state. Earlier in the semester we read a research article entitled “Love Will Steer the Stars” that talked about love myths present within songs and their effect on the audience. Songs such as “Stay With Me” strike a chord with the audience because “ the combination of words with music makes song especially powerful, striking the listener simultaneously on emotional and cognitive levels (Bader p. 146).  The study found that around 2.5 love myths are present person song in American pop ( Bader, 2007).
I decide to conduct my own informal content analysis of the song “Stay With Me” by using the same love myths that Bader coded for in the original analysis and found that in “Stay With Me” 4 love myths were present (listed below). I was not surprised to find love myths present, because Smith cites various American pop divas such as Whitney Houston and Mariah Carey as influences. Furthermore, it was not surprising to find love myths present because his “Stay With Me” because his song was carefully crafted for a mainstream taste. Again, there have been many gay artists in the past, but never at a time when at which the gay rights movement has been as strong in the U.S. “Stay With Me” offers gay presence within mainstream music without disrupting the status quo. His gayness is glossed over. The description of his lover is anonymous. No other information is given about his lover except for the causal encounter. So while I applaud Smith for his talent, I feel as though he leaves the audience wanting to know more. His first album offers little deviation from popular heterosexual scripts, I’m excited to see if his second album will abandon some of the love myths and offer more about his gay identity.

Love Myth #2 There’s such a thing as “love at first sight”.

Love Myth #4 If your partner is truly “meant for you,” sex is easy and wonderful

Love Myth #10 The right mater “completes you”---filling your needs and making your dreams come true

Love Myth #11 In real life, actors and actresses are often very much like the romantic characters they portray.

Bader, A. (2007). "Love will steer the stars" and other improbable feats: Media myths in popular love songs. In M.-L. Galician & D. L. Merskin (Eds.), Critical thinking about sex, love, and romance in the mass media (pp. 141-160). Mahwah, NJ: Lawrence Erlbaum.